a life

I spent sometime with the parent of my best friend, Orvokki, who moved to Finland last summer. They are visiting NYC from North Carolina. I have known them for one year or so. They are always so warm and kind that I can be really myself. I don’t know if I should write this, but I found out today that their son in law had passed away two months ago. It was on my birthday, February 8th. I've known that he has been suffering from a brain cancer. I've never met him or his wife who is Orvokki's sister, but I will not forget the day of his death. It would be strange to say, but I feel connected to all the family member of hers. Beneath their smile, I saw their sadness and pain, yet there was nothing that I could do or say. Life is unpredictable and death is not avoidable. However, dying at one's young age is hard to accept, especially for people who are left. The longer I live, the more I will have to face this. I looked up the night sky after I had left them. All I could do was to wish for his eternal sleep in the vast universe or as a part of the universe. May peace for somebody who passed away on the date when I was born and for the family who has been so warm and kind to me.

unexpected visitors

Since I started this blog, I've been having a few unexpected visitors from time to time. For example, I had a good comment from a director of one of the big galleries in Chelsea. Last week, Mr.99, who is a publisher of an art guide magazine, whom I met about a few years ago on the bus in Chelsea, happened to visit my blog and left a nice comment. In addition, he told me that I wrote well. Yoo-hoo! Having those unexpected visitors or words IS encouraging and surprising. It is like a day when somebody visits my house without notice but with a bunch of flowers. What a nice surprise! Initially, I began this blog site to keep up on my English. For that purpose, I could have just chosen a conventional way,"diary," but then I knew that the notebook would end up being left in the back of my book shelf or under my bed and never be opened or found. Even if I kept writing, I would not be able to read my scribbling, due to the nature of keeping one's diary. So, I thought that a little possibility that somebody may see it would make myself consistent. Obviously, it is working so far. Strangely enough though, I feel more comfortable with writing in English than in Japanese. Because of ambiguity and complication of its language, when I try to write in Japanese, I sometimes have no idea what I am writing about or where to stop. Still, It isn't easy to articulate my thoughts in English, yet in order to share with as many people as possible, it is necessary. A few visitors or my friends who never leave comments on my blog but tell me a good thing about it give me strength. So, for them or future visitors, I will always keep my door open and have a cup of tea named "words" together.